Me, me and more of me!

So occasionally the part of me that totally loves myself likes to blog about my favorite topic. Me! LOL. No really. Sometimes people read my blog that don't know me or know little about me. So from time to time I like to do a this and that type of blog about me to highlight some little details about me that some of you may know and some of you may not. I encourage those who read my blog (hint, hint KELLY) to do the same.

I have lived my entire life in New Jersey and though I desperately want to try living somewhere else I probably never will. My roots are kind of firmly planted.

I am fairly certain at least two of my exes are gay. At times I have wondered if this had anything to do with me or was just a coincidence. Hmmmmm. I don't wonder this much anymore though. I think people are just who they are.

Although I hate a lot of things that have happened in my past I wouldn't change any of it. I think everything happens for a reason and I think altering the past changes the future and could lead to different things. So as much as I hate some of what has happened and some decisions I have made, I have made a sort of peace with it all.

I count things. I guess you can say it is an OCD sort of thing. If I am waiting for something I decide what number said thing will happen at and I start counting. If it doesn't happen at that number I start the process again. It is weird. Don't know why I do it, can't explain it any better than I have, don't know when I started doing it, because I always remember doing it, I actually do not remember a time I didn't do it, it just is what it is. To me it is as normal as say going to the bathroom.

I hate boogies in noses, and I hate ear wax in ears. I like noses and ears to be clean. I don't like seeing anything in them, on them, near them. My kids think I am weird, I annoy the heck out of them because of this, but they have clean ears and noses.

I believe in everything happening for a reason. When I was working in the healthcare field there was one type of patient that I disliked working with. An aphasic patient. Doing home health I requested to not have any aphasic patients, I could not tolerate it. But in the nursing homes and hospitals I had to deal with it. It frustrated me, and it frustrated them. I tried my hardest, but I am sure they sensed my frustration. I think God gave me a child with a similar problem as a lesson in patience. A lesson I surely needed, but I feel it is at the cost of Jewel's voice and I often feel very guilty about that.

Darkness not only scares me, in the sense of boogie man fears, but it affects my sense of balance.

I cannot wait for my husband to go gray and get older. I find myself oddly attracted to older men, especially ones with gray hair. I do think my husband is a hottie now don't get me wrong. But I can only imagine what the coming years will turn him into.

Hmmmmm, can't think of anything else you guys haven't heard already. Now I want to see what everyone else has to tell us about themselves. KELLY this means you. I folded some laundry so I deserve to read a blog by you, what's it been 4 months?!?!?!

The Real McCain?

At Fort McNair, an army base located along the Potomac River in the nation's capital, a chance reunion takes place one day between two former POWs. It's the spring of 1974, and Navy commander John Sidney McCain III has returned home from the experience in Hanoi that, according to legend, transformed him from a callow and reckless youth into a serious man of patriotism and purpose. Walking along the grounds at Fort McNair, McCain runs into John Dramesi, an Air Force lieutenant colonel who was also imprisoned and tortured in Vietnam.
McCain is studying at the National War College, a prestigious graduate program he had to pull strings with the Secretary of the Navy to get into. Dramesi is enrolled, on his own merit, at the Industrial College of the Armed Forces in the building next door.
There's a distance between the two men that belies their shared experience in North Vietnam — call it an honor gap. Like many American POWs, McCain broke down under torture and offered a "confession" to his North Vietnamese captors. Dramesi, in contrast, attempted two daring escapes. For the second he was brutalized for a month with daily torture sessions that nearly killed him. His partner in the escape, Lt. Col. Ed Atterberry, didn't survive the mistreatment. But Dramesi never said a disloyal word, and for his heroism was awarded two Air Force Crosses, one of the service's highest distinctions. McCain would later hail him as "one of the toughest guys I've ever met."
On the grounds between the two brick colleges, the chitchat between the scion of four-star admirals and the son of a prizefighter turns to their academic travels; both colleges sponsor a trip abroad for young officers to network with military and political leaders in a distant corner of the globe.
"I'm going to the Middle East," Dramesi says. "Turkey, Kuwait, Lebanon, Iran."
"Why are you going to the Middle East?" McCain asks, dismissively.
"It's a place we're probably going to have some problems," Dramesi says.
"Why? Where are you going to, John?"
"Oh, I'm going to Rio."
"What the hell are you going to Rio for?"
McCain, a married father of three, shrugs.
"I got a better chance of getting laid."
Dramesi, who went on to serve as chief war planner for U.S. Air Forces in Europe and commander of a wing of the Strategic Air Command, was not surprised. "McCain says his life changed while he was in Vietnam, and he is now a different man," Dramesi says today. "But he's still the undisciplined, spoiled brat that he was when he went in."
McCAIN FIRST
This is the story of the real John McCain, the one who has been hiding in plain sight. It is the story of a man who has consistently put his own advancement above all else, a man willing to say and do anything to achieve his ultimate ambition: to become commander in chief, ascending to the one position that would finally enable him to outrank his four-star father and grandfather.
In its broad strokes, McCain's life story is oddly similar to that of the current occupant of the White House. John Sidney McCain III and George Walker Bush both represent the third generation of American dynasties. Both were born into positions of privilege against which they rebelled into mediocrity. Both developed an uncanny social intelligence that allowed them to skate by with a minimum of mental exertion. Both struggled with booze and loutish behavior. At each step, with the aid of their fathers' powerful friends, both failed upward. And both shed their skins as Episcopalian members of the Washington elite to build political careers as self-styled, ranch-inhabiting Westerners who pray to Jesus in their wives' evangelical churches.
In one vital respect, however, the comparison is deeply unfair to the current president: George W. Bush was a much better pilot.


Want to read the rest???? Check it out here.....it is interesting....

http://www.rollingstone.com/news/coverstory/make_believe_maverick_the_real_john_mccain/page/1

Sesame Place

Today we went to Sesame Place. Variety Club had their Halloween Spooktacular. We all had a lot of fun. Jewel especially, which is the way it should be. Days like today when Jewel is around her peers who also have some sort of developmental disabilities are so important for her. It makes her see that she is not the only one who is different. That kids are not all the same, that kids come in all shapes, sizes, that some walk different, some talk different, some hear different, etc. She had a really fun day. All three kids actually got along really well all day long which is a huge shocker, even for the car ride, both ways. Jewel got her face painted, Carlos and Amber climbed up the cargo nets, the kids all did the trick or treat scavenger hunt. The weather was perfect, the kids were perfect, just a perfect day, I could not have asked for anything better.

Finally an Update

So I bought instant pudding today made pudding pie, the right way. See Jewel's messy little face? The girls loved it. They so far are the only one's who ate it. Because Carlos is not home, John is working, and I am ready for this, sit down, not hungry! My meds are working for me again, praise God!

I have been a total blog drop out so I figure I should do an update on us and everything here.

Carlos is done with cross country. He finished the countys 40th out of 98 boys, which I find impressive since this was his first year running ever. He ran the 1.5 mile in 10:45, which was not even his best time all year but still great! He starts wrestling in a couple weeks. Middle school is agreeing with him. His grades are up, his moral is up, school pride is high, he is in shape (not like he wasn't before, just in better shape), and he just seems to be doing well overall.

Amber is adjusting to 1st grade well. She is excelling in math, and finding herself weak in reading and language arts. Thankfully they are putting her in basic skills. We are hoping by January this helps, if not we will be looking at other ways to intervene. I am going to have to seriously consider home schooling her though should things not turn around after all options are exhausted though. She is the type of child who need serious one on one, no distraction type of instruction. We shall see what the next few months brings us. We are also working on her other issues, that seems to be going well so far. We have her understanding there are issues there, but have to get her to believe she wants to overcome these things before we can start really battling them. In her mind she likes things the way they are. I guess accepting the way things are seems a better alternative to fighting to change them, she knows it will be hard.

Jewel's speech is exploding. That said compared to her peers she is still so far behind and she is still unintelligible a large portion of the time to people who are unfamiliar with her. Her social skills are blooming though and we really could not be more proud about that! The girls had their Halloween party last night and Jewel partied! This girl really danced the night away. She interacted with other kids, kept up with her peers (even older ones), and really just enjoyed herself. We are really just happy her delays are not "delaying" her. She got her medi-alert bracelet last week and is absolutely over the moon about it, it really is very pretty.

John & I are well..... John & I. He works, I stay home, things are the same. The economy sucks, things look so so grim, the whole political situation is depressing. Who knows what the future holds. Things are a-okay here for now though. I totally planned on going back to real estate in Sept of next year when Jewels started kindergarten, but I am not even sure with all the forecasts I am hearing that would be wise. I am thinking of getting a regular 9-5 then for a year or so where I will be guaranteed a paycheck from week to week. I hear all sorts of things like they don't expect the housing market to make a comeback for 2 years, others say 5 years, who knows. I guess I will wait until the time gets closer. I hate the unknown. Career wise, lots of things are sitting on the edge right now, not just for me. Such is life though.

I messed up

The other day I was feeling fairly domestic and decided to not only get an early start on dinner but to made a dessert too. What to make, what to make? Lemon bars? Mmmmm. All the kids don't like that though. Chocolate death in the crock? Too late to start it. Chocolate pudding pie? Simple, fast, and everyone likes it, right? OK so I look at the pudding directions, 4 hours to set, hmmmmm, should have time. 4 hours later the pudding was still watery. Very watery. What the heck? Did I mention I have only made instant pudding in the past and this pudding I actually cooked on the stove top, but I followed the directions. So here we are 2 days later. And you can still literally pour this pudding it is that watery. What went wrong? I'll tell you. I didn't buy instant, that was my mistake. I usually never goof up desserts. Dinners I have occasionally, ok on a rare occasion goofed, but never desserts. I usually make good desserts. I am sad. And I want chocolate pudding pie too.

Not the Same Thing!

UGH. During last night's debate he mentioned over and over no one knows autism like Sarah Palin. Hello McFly her son has Downs Syndrome, not autism. They are not freaking interchangeable. Every time he said it I cringed. Why no one called him out on the fact he made such an error and sat there looking like he knew very little about Palin shocked me.

On the same subject, it disgusts me that the McCain-Palin campaign are really playing up the whole we are "pro" special needs children. Bull! Are most people aware before Trig, Palin's son who has Downs, was born she cut funding for special needs in her state by up to 50%? They are not for special needs children at all, Governor Palin happens to have a special needs child, who by the way is what 5 months old and sees his mother how much?

McCain also commented last night that Palin is a role model for all women. Cements my belief he only choose her because she is a woman and he is looking for that female vote. To him there is no difference between Clinton and Palin and he forged ahead with her thinking he would capture all of Clinton's votes simply because both politicians have a vagina. WRONGO!!!!! Give women a little credit Senator McCain. By the way Palin is far from my role model.

Last Supper

I am back!!!!! Well not really. My desktop has been in the shop and I had typing on my laptop with a passion. Sooooo I have been neglecting my blog. Not only that, there's nothing new at all, and I just haven't been in the mood. But yesterday I read a story that caught my attention. Ohio executed an overweight man who was appealing his death sentence saying that due to his weight it would be inhumane. This man was 5'7 and 267 pounds, so yeah he was overweight. His claim was that they would not be able to find a viable vein to inject him and he also wanted a single drug rather than the three drug combo. In any case I don't really find his appeal shocking, I don't find what he claimed shocking, especially since Ohio has a history of botched executions.

What I did find totally appalling was this guy's last meal. Now before I go into what his meal was, let me just say I would be commenting on his meal whether he was 5'7 and 100 pounds or what he actually was. I seriously could not care less about his weight at all. The night before he died he ordered a special meal which included T-bone steak with A-1 sauce, onion rings, french fries, four eggs over easy, toast with butter, hash browns, a pint of rocky road ice cream, a Mountain Dew soft drink and bear claw pastries. Yeah I get this was his last meal ever on Earth but seriously did the two girls he murdered get the chance to say good bye to loved ones before they died, to make peace with whomever they had to, to live beyond a mere 20 years old. No, he murdered them and most likely gave it no second thought whatever. But this guy at least knew he was going to meet his maker, had time to say his goodbyes, and what not. I do not think he should have dined on anything but normal prison food before he died. e have homeless people in the country eating out of garbage cans to survive, families eating Ramen noodles nightly so they can pay their rent, people choosing between eating or paying for medications they need. What is done to help those people eat a decent meal? Very little. But this bastard is rewarded for murdering two people with a meal fit for a king. What a crock of shit.

I don't think death row inmates should be treated badly. I actually do not even believe in a death sentence at all. But to give someone something out of the ordinary is outrageous just because they are set to die. This country is so ass backwards it is sad. Liberty and justice for all my ass. I am uber annoyed at the state of our country right now and reading a story like this, seeing how our tax money is spent in ridiculous ways, just pisses me off even more.

::::sigh::::

I am so discouraged with the politics right now I didn't even watch the debate last night. Sad, huh? I was so excited for the first debate, maybe even more excited for the veep debate last week, but this one I don't know. I feel the question dodging, the mudslinging, just the regular political bullshit is really doing a disservice to us as a country. I know it is nothing new, but this being the first election I am totally into, I am just finding myself disgusting with it all.

Why aren't their commercials about them, instead they are about what their rival can or cannot do. Why can't they seem to answer a question that is asked of them before going off on a tagent about something totally unrelated. Focus here fellows. If you are that great of a candidate focus on YOU, not the other guy. I am just completely discouraged. So what did I do last night instead? I watched Dirty Jobs of course. Mike Rowe is my hero, no seriously, I do find him very attractive. If you have never watched you have to check it out, even if only to see Mike.

Warning Mookie Doodle Designs

I highly suggest to anyone who frequents WAHM businesses online that they beware of Jennifer Davis of FL. After being her customer for quite some time, I am now in a situation where I stand to loss out on $100+ worth of items that are due me from her. Although her work"mom"ship has always been great, her customer service now leaves very much to be desired. She has always had a slower than normal turn around time, but at this point in time due to the amount of time my order is taking, excuses galore, discrepancies in her emails to me, and a down right nasty attitude I have been forced to file a dispute with PayPal to try to recoup my money. I know of at least a few places she sells at this time.
Mookie Doodle Designs- Make Your Day Smell a Little Sweeter!!
Just Sew Savvy™ Online Shop
I have also been told some information regarding her can be found here as well.
http://thedramaofdiaperswappers.wordpress.com/2008/09/11/threats-on-ds/andhttp://thedramaofdiaperswappers.wordpress.com/2008/09/14/birds-of-a-feather/

Just beware of who you order from and always always file with PayPal within the time frame for a claim if in doubt. Since outing this WAHM I have been contacted by at least 8 people who are still waiting on something from her, or know of someone who is waiting on something. It seems Jennifer likes to try to get by with printing PayPal shipping labels far in advance of mailing packages if she mails them at all. In the past there have also been a question of her holding a raffle for a mama who sadly lost a child and then never sending the proceeds from the raffle to that mama. Some other very gracious person stepped up and sent that mama what the proceeds were and whether or not she was every reimbursed by Jennifer I have no idea.

A new addition

My husband has got to be one of the most patient, understanding, easy going, passive individuals I have ever met. Well he is with me anyway, some people actually see him as a total bear. But he is just my big teddy bear. Yesterday out of the clear blue sky I called him up while he was at work and asked if I could get a hamster. He asks me why. I give him my reasons. Mostly to make the kids smile! Anyway he tells me this, "We talked about pets, no more pets Holly, no more, ok? But do whatever you want." He always adds that do whatever you want thing. You think he would have learned by now that the sarcastic, guilt inducing comment does not work on me, at all. Because within an hour I was purchasing an adorable little teddy bear hamster which I named Sandy along with an awesome condo like cage. The pet store said it was a boy but being so young it is kind of hard to tell for sure so a unisex name like Sandy suits him well. He is white and cream color, and shy so no pictures yet.

The kids got home from school at staggered times, so each of them got to be surprised individually. Their smiles are totally worth it all. Sandy is residing in Jewel's room since she has the most room, and shhhh don't tell them I am saying this, but the most neat one of the three. Everyone seems to understand although she is rooming with Jewel, she is everyone's pet. So far anyway. I expect to get a few complaints once the novelty wears off and I am sure each child will be begging for their own, which will certainly not happen.

My awesome hubby didn't get home until about 10 last night and he seemed fairly ok with the family member, although he still doesn't understand why? But with me, I think he is fairly used to unpredictable, spur of the moment, instant gratification decision making by now. Hopefully in a few days Sandy (AKA Little Guy by Jewel) will be more settled and I'll get a few adorable shots of him to share.